I believe that compassion changes yourself and others. I also believe in the wondrous healing power of self-love. Inside each and every one of us is an inner wisdom that is waiting awakening! I believe self-love, self-expression and self-care are the most important tools in navigating life.
My intention for you is to heal the pain that residues within your heart to help you in stepping into a life of purpose and passion.
There was a time when I was completely closed off and disconnected with life. Every-day was a constant struggle. I would wake up in immense emotional pain constantly feeling a ball of anxiety in the pit of my stomach. My fight or flight response was continually activated and I was always ready for attack. This heightened emotional state caused me to feel constantly sick, lacking in energy and completely cut off from every-one around me.
I was stuck in toxic behaviours that reflected to me my inner self-hatred, pain and suffering.
– Binge eating and yo-yo dieting: I would emotionally eat every night, binging on foods that would exacerbate my mental state.
– Constant anxiety: my heart would continually race, my body was always shaking on high alert and there would an avalanche of worrying thoughts all day.
– Staying in unhealthy relationships longer than necessary
– Extreme emotional outbursts: I would spend my days crying and yelling. Pushing all those who were trying to help me and love me away. I would scream at them that they didn’t understand and would repetitively tell myself I had no-one.
– Social withdrawal: I would say no to life. No to my friends, no to my family, no to everything. I excluded myself from all functions. I didn’t want to leave the house and when I did it frightened me. I didn’t want to be alone but I hated being around people. I spent days in emotional turmoil conflicted about how to act and the ‘right’ way to do things.
– Shallow breathing and panic attacks: I continually was unable to breathe past my chest. Regularly having panic attacks about my thoughts, feelings and also about those around me.
– Enormously fearful of situations: I was scared to leave the house because I thought people saw me as weak and as a target. I couldn’t make eye contact with anyone and I walked looking at my feet.
– Spending money I didn’t have on things I didn’t need: I felt empty. I felt like I was nothing. So I started to blow what little money I made on materialistic possessions in the hope that I could feel happiness and joy.
– Sleeping all hours of the day or not at all: I could be awake until 3am immersed in my thoughts. Suffocated by the voices that were telling me I was nothing. Alternatively, I could also find myself staying in bed and needing to sleep all the time. Run down and exhausted from the never ending worry thoughts.
– Bullying: I often found myself in situations where I was taken advantage of, where people used me for this and for that. I had a low opinion of myself and I was open to being used and abused. I didn’t think anything of myself and therefore found people attacking me, yelling at me and reiterating to me that I wasn’t enough.
– Trying to keep everyone happy: I continuously felt unworthy. As a result, I would often try and please everyone so I had friends. I felt undeserving and I felt that I owed them for talking to me. I had no worth, therefore, I found myself proving to myself and to the world that I people liked me. I would give them presents, give them all of my time and put so much energy into making them happy so they would give me attention and love I desperately craved.
– Putting on a mask and pretending to be someone I wasn’t so people would like and accept me: I had no idea who I was, what I liked and where I was going. I was an open target. I moulded myself to the expectations of my partner, of my parents and of my firneds. I listened and took on board everything that people said around me I changed to suit them. I changed to gain approval, love and recognition. I was whatever anyone needed me to be whenever they needed me to be it.
After years of self-abuse where I found myself staying in situations where I continually compromised my values and happiness for the sake of other people, I reached my breaking point.
The catalyst for me came over the course of a few months where my life seemingly spiraled out of control.
I lost my “dream” job.
I suffered the abandonment of my partner whom I believed to be ‘the one’ at a time where I was already struggling.
My only sister died suddenly and unexpectedly.
At my darkest point, I believed I was nothing. To the core of my being, I felt that I wasn’t even worthy of living.
I couldn’t feel love. I couldn’t see hope.
I looked at the people around me feeling completely and utterly empty. On most days it seemed like an impossible task to take in a breath. I would wake up in a panic state and continue the day feeling like my mind was attacking me. All these thoughts, all of these feelings, I couldn’t shake. I believed what my mind told me, no questions.
That fearful voice in my head told me that, if I didn’t have my partner I was nothing, my sister died so I was all alone, I failed at my dream job so I am not worthy. And on and on it went. All day long and all night long.
Broke, broken-hearted and beaten but not out. In the stillness of self and the quiet of night a voice spoke to me with just the words “there’s more for you!”
Right there, begun my path to finding myself! I read endless amounts of books, spoke to all my idols, listened to YouTube videos, watched documentary and contacted whoever I could to help me!
Whoever said knowledge is power is 100% correct. I let my inner wisdom guide me and through this I devoured any and all information I could.
I discovered who I was, I found my true inner passion and most important of all I started to love myself again. With this love came the action of owning myself – my thoughts, feelings and emotions! This new found love had me making friends, speaking my truth and engaging in life in a way that I never had before. For the first time in my life, I felt good enough! I felt worthy! I was engaged and living. I had found my passion and doors were opening.
In life there is never a breakdown only a breakthrough and with this in mind I created this program from a deep place of love and compassion.
My journey is now about helping you!! I believe you are worthy, you have value and my goodness you are enough.
My inner being is guided to helping you cultivate self-love, find your inner truth and the confidence to live the life your heart truly desires
Through one on one mentoring program and a community based group called ‘WomanKind’ I will be your guide on the path to self-discovery. Helping you to push past the resistance to remain within your comfort zone and break down the limiting beliefs that are keeping you stuck. Waiting for you is the life you deserve full of love, happiness and peace!
Looking forward to chatting to you!
With loving compassion,